a month of traveling. growing and learning.

well Friday morning at 6am, I pull out of Dothan for the adventure of a lifetime, or at least that is what I would like to call it. I will be traveling all over the place it seems. The journey will start in South Carolina where I will be staying with a pretty rad family, one is an artist and owns a music shop and their little boy has long hair, its destined to be a good time. I will be in charge of watching the little one and we will be living on the beach. The next stop is North Carolina where I will be visiting a super good friend that I met on my trip to Rwanda. I will be staying there for a few days. Then I will be driving up to New York to meet up with the family. Half of the family will be flying home, while the other half will be driving down the coast to see D.C and the other pretty sights along the way. NEXT. home. well, for 4 days and then the big adventure to Uganda begins. 

I know that this summer is going to be a time to grow. a time to watch things unravel. A time to see Jesus in sunrises, sunsets, smiles, strangers, car rides, wind in my hair, kiddos giggles, the late night pit stops, the good pillows, the bad pillows, the dinners that will be caught and cooked on the fire, the hiking, the singing, the pictures and videos. 

And then Uganda happens-- I get to meet the team. I get to fly across the world to be back on that red dirt and then all of the previous things I mentioned no longer matter. I could go without a pillow just to see one big, bright white smile upon a dirty little face.

Here is to a good month. with good friends. good family. good food. good music. and a great Jesus. I am thankful.

*I will be posting blogs on here about my adventures.

happy summer.

a beautiful mess

there are moments in our life we never forget

to list a few

-the day my sister was born

-the day my second sister was born

-the day I graduated high school

-the day I packed my room and moved to Montgomery

-the time I moved back home

-the time I got my cat Joey

-the first time I flew in a plane

-the first time I signed up for my mission trip

-the first time I walked into an orphanage

-the first time Joseani held my hand

-the time I flew by myself

-the first time I felt the holy spirit

-the moment that I walked into a homeless shelter

It was this past Wednesday, it was in my hometown and it housed nearly 70 residents. I talked to the director and set up a tour with the associate pastor at my church and we were on the way. In my mind, I was just going into a local business to see how things are ran, but what I was really walking into was what seemed to be an orphanage for adults... in the united states. We walked in to the first room to see multiple bunk beds that lined the walls. I listened intently to the director explain about how things are ran, how they have rules that they must follow, how during the day the residents cannot be in their beds, how they must pass drug test, how they must be trying to get a job etc. 

That was the first building which was the mens dorms, next was the ladies dorm and with that of course comes the chance of  kiddos... I asked if their were families that lived on the facility and he proceed to tell me about the families that did in fact live there and then we were shown their rooms--

we entered the building with the rooms for the families, it was all clean, quaint, but I still felt something stirring inside. He showed us an unoccupied room with 5 cots in a tiny bedroom and told us that there was a lady coming in with 5 children coming in that night-- my heart sunk. 

There I was standing in a room with 5 cots in one tiny bedroom waiting to be occupied by a family, by a mother who fears, by kiddos who have no clue, by tears, by memories, by laughter, by life. This wasn't just a thought for the moment, this is a moment that I have been stuck on

since seeing the bedroom.

being in that bedroom in that homeless shelter wasnt her dream growing up, it wasnt part of her plan but somewhere and somehow she got here and not by herself, but with 5 children, 5 other lives that she is in charge of. I do not know the lady moving in, I do not know her story, I have never met her or her children, but her Father has. Her Father knows her story and no matter how wild her story may or may not be He does not love her any less. He values her and her 5 precious children just as much as He did the day each of them were born.  && that is what makes her life so beautiful.

I am not sure how to end this entry. I have thought of catchy things to say, but none of them are seeming to fit. So I am going to end it with a thought and a prayer for each of you reading-- Jesus, break our heart for what breaks yours, show us what we can do daily to help someone in need, even if that is just a smile, show us ways to help lift people up, let us love people like you love them and not judge them by their past, let us not see their living situation but let us see their living potential. Let us be your hands and feet in our own community. Let us, as your children, love like you taught us to love. Let us be bold in who you created us to be. 

Thank you for reading. A challenge I am going to leave you with: get out there and plug yourself into an outreach program. Its needed more than we realize.

The Struggle is Real.

It tends to go in this order. One day you are on top of the world it seems, you pray at the drop of a hat, you thank Him for the tiniest things, you see Him in everything and then the very next day its like you're having to cut through fog. Its like you are having to remind yourself that He is here and the He does still love you. Today was one of those days.

I felt rushed, I missed a shower for my cousins wedding, I lead devotion on the conference call and was unsatisfied with how it turned out, I finished the call by talking about spiritual warfare and how hard the enemy is going to try to keep us questioning everything, worrying and doubting our calling. I told the team to cover themselves in prayer, to rebuke the enemy.

&& what happens not 20 minutes later I can't sleep due to the enemy completely trying to attack me. I finally fell asleep and then woke up in a panic, I lost two hours. I doubted everything, I questioned everything, I worried, I gave up. I talked to a friend who seems to be there a lot for me, who is always a phone call away and I questioned 'going off the grid' just to catch a break. But then in a small voice I heard 'Uganda'--

I got off the phone, parked my car and walked around praying, I was quickly reminded of how minor my 'bad' afternoon had been. I was quickly reminded how much Jesus loves me. I was reminded of how much power I just gave the enemy. Power that he did and does not deserve ever. I am a warrior, a princess to a matchless King even and the fact that I let the enemy hold that power over me makes me sick to the thought. I was quickly reminded in just my few minutes of prayer and resting how many promises Jesus has promised me. How many things He has yet to reveal to me. I was reminded about my trip coming up, of those kiddos who face real problems each day. 

I had a reality check and it was a good one. It was powerful and I am thankful. 

"What can wash away my sin?

Nothing but the blood of Jesus

What can make me whole again?
Nothing but the blood of Jesus.

Oh! precious is the flow
That makes me white as snow;
No other fount I know,
Nothing but the blood of Jesus."