the fair | written the other day

I went to the fair last night with new friends. It was easy to say it was the most I'd laughed in sometime. I've not written in a while because my heart has been in other places, over things. However, here I am on a Saturday morning, listening to my Pepaw cut grass outside. He's wearing his denim button up- he's known for that in the fall. Here I am with a  heart that isn't ready to grow up. I want to stay little forever, but that's impossible.

Last night as I walked around the fair, I realized just how much I have grown up. I saw so many people who I haven't seen in years. One of them was the best surprise of all, to see him happy, married and excited about life. His wife is everything I pictured she would be. Perfect for him. I watched people from my past walk by, like they never knew me. I watched people show off their new relationships. Catching up was fast and short lived because of the crowd, but it was nice to hug and speak for just a little bit.

I remember as a little girl I use to look so forward to the fair, like couldn't sleep the night before because I was so excited about it being here. Then it was here and I went every night, along with my best friend. It was expensive and immature, but we loved it. I am not even sure why. I realized last night- that there is no need to go more than once.

I walked around last night and of course studied people. I watched people show off their new babies, their engagement rings, talk about their new exciting jobs. I watched young couples argue, I watched people be polite and some people have no manners at all. I watched people flirt and I watched people meet new friends. I used to buy new clothes just to wear to the fair, because you never knew who you would see. Last night before we left the house we watched Parks and Recs until the very last second. Then I realized that it was time to put my hair up and get out of sweatpants. Last night I walked around and saw girls with the same problem I use to have--comparing themselves to others-- That's an entire blog entry on its on, that may be the next one. But, last night. I walked around fully confident in who I am, laughing at inside jokes and loving time with new friends.

I giggled on the Tilt-A-Whirl, more than normal. Simply because I was continent, but ready to grow. Its my favorite ride and has been forever. Its a classic, its one that has been there forever and it never changes. It stays the same, but while I got on it last night I knew that I wanted my life to be a tiny bit like that-- constant, steady and a classic. But, on the other hand I realized now more than ever that I want my life to change. I could tell last night just how much it already has changed. Life changes people, experiences change people- so of course I've changed. However, I'm ready for more. This was the last National Peanut Festival for a while and I'm thankful for every different season my life has been in while attending the fair.