'I had a pipe in one hand and the prayer hotline on the phone'
'im pregnant with twins, my other set of twins are 17 and one is having brain surgery tomorrow'
I have three children who are all college graduates'
'I lost my wife 3 years ago, I just wanna feel Jesus'
'I'm 6, I like school and playdoh"
these are real stories told by real people who just want to feel Jesus. They want to feel something that sticks, they want to feel worth it, they want to feel love. Some are still searching for Him and some have thrown in the flag and given up: simply to be given the best gift of all.... peace.
I woke up yesterday like a kid at Christmas time. Ready for the evening to get to serve in the community. Throughout the day there were multiple people praying for it to go just how Jesus wanted it to go. We knew the plan was to meet there at 3 and the couple of us who could, would help them cook. When I got there we had 7 volunteers ready to cook. We met an incredible man named Mr. JR, he usually cooks in the kitchen and we were able to give him the break that he deserved. He is a hard working man so of course he put on his apron and helped us as much as he could. The worship leader was in the chapel setting up and I jumped in to help him. As a 'co-leader' of this night, I was nervous. I had no clue what to tell people to do, I know that in previous things I have come across as bossy so with everything in me I was trying my best to refrain from giving out jobs so I patiently waited for my 'co-leader' to show up only for him to tell me that I had that under control.
There are moments during days that I seriously hear Jesus yelling in a megaphone 'YOU HAVE THIS, NOW GO FOR IT' and I sheepishly say back 'nope, you've got the wrong girl', but clearly He doesn't or he wouldnt place these passions in my heart, he would break my heart for what breaks his and he wouldnt have me standing in a kitchen with 7 people asking me what to do. This was only the start.
Whenever I plan a fundraiser or an event I am usually so pumped up about it, I have everything in order. Its been covered in prayer and then about 30-45 minutes before it beings I start worrying. Its like the enemy does everything he can to try and stop it, to stop me. So I paced around the chapel area for about 10 minutes just worrying about petty things 'what if we dont have enough volunteers', 'what if we dont connect with them', 'what if, what if, what if' so I pace and I dwell. Then I throw in the flag. Our co-leader, Matt gathers the cooking team and then he calls on me to pray, absolutely not. I do not want to pray, I want to sulk right now. I want to think of every negative thing that could go wrong, but what happens.
I pray. Take a deep breath. & then let it go. I walked back into the kitchen to see everyone laughing and having a blast. Mr. JR is cutting up with the rest of them. Some are washing dishes, some are baking bread, some are making salad. And then it hit me --- "Its not about how perfect tonight is in my eyes, its about these people who are coming in, about being His hands and feet, loving them like the loves them and seeing them how He sees them.'
It was about 5:20 and the back doors opened and in poured about 25-30 volunteers, I couldn't contain my grin. I tend to have this goofy grin when I'm doing something that I know Jesus is all over. Its kind of like if my cheeks hurt after the day is over, Jesus was in it. I had nicely assigned jobs, we prayed over the volunteers and then it was time for the doors to open. I was so ready. WE were so ready. They opened and I realized, great, everyone has a job but me. so I handed people a fork and salad.
They got finish and of course I walked to the one kiddo in the room, she grabbed my hand and I was set. I had made my connection for the night. I had my friend and we were going to get playdoh so that we could sit at the table and hang out while the adults were having big service. And as sure as I sat on the small seat, I heard Him again 'nope, get up'. Of course I could have stayed in my comfort zone, of course I could have sat in the back and talked to the little girl all night, but I was being pushed. So I introduced my new little friend to some other friends and watching that flourish thought the remanded of the night was worth it. I made the rounds to make sure everything was taken care of and that people were ready to start worship soon and then I was going to sit.
You see, I can talk to kids all. day. long. but adults is the challenge at hand here. I walked by a lady and saw that her ankle was wrapped in a cast, pulled up a chair and didn't get up until I learned her entire story, even then I started talking to the lady across from me. I stayed in that general area for the reminder of the night. I learned things about these ladies, I watched them worship, I heard them pray, I watched them cry. Then I stood back to look around the room to see the worship band, who was only supposed to have 2 people playing due to last minute things, who now had 6 people. We even had a mandolin player! I looked around to see people connecting with people. I stood in the very back, held back tears and thanked Jesus that he allowed us to be there. The message was beautiful and through the tears in the room it seemed to hit a few people in the best way it could.
I will never forget last night. I will never be able to thank Jesus enough for allowing me to be a part of something so beautiful. I will never be able to thank the volunteers who showed up and jumped in. I am so thankful for so many things and I am ready for the next one. I am ready for Jesus to open more doors for City Reach.
By the end of the night my cheeks hurt && I was so thankful that they did.
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